Dusty Rhodes: Fresh Ink

Untitled Document If you’ve ever lived in an actual city, you might not think of Springfield and the term “urban sprawl” in the same sentence. Or the same paragraph. Or even the same series of paperback mysteries. Springfield’s urban sprawl is like Springfield’s “rush hour” or its nightlife — it does exist but in a […]

Untitled Document I’m not a fan of horror movies, but I think most of them start with a beautiful girl enjoying a carefree life, then suddenly being attacked by a monster. If you can adjust that scenario down to kindergarten age, I’ve got a gorefest for you. Our movie opens with young Sammi Rafferty trying […]

Untitled Document Every time I interview Tony Kerasotes, he presents me with the exact same problem: How do I ask a follow-up question when my chin is on the floor?      We first talked in January, just after he had exercised his extraordinary powers as the CEO of Kerasotes Showplace Theaters — which owns […]

Untitled Document I’ve got a belated Valentine. I’m a day late, but everything’s relative: The love story I’m about to tell you was delayed for nearly a decade. It begins with a pair of high-school sweethearts — Heather Siebert and Jason Morgan. They started dating in July 1994 and broke up eight months later. “He […]

Do me a favor: Skip this column. If you’re a regular reader, you already know the truth; if you’re not, you likely won’t care. If you don’t avert your eyes now, you’re going to get a shot of a middle-aged reporter’s full-frontal pettiness, and it isn’t going to be pretty. I’ve tried other options. Forgiving, […]

My first column of 2006 was about a New Year’s Eve wedding marred by a thief who filched a fistful of cards from the gift table at the happy couple’s reception. What made this petty thievery especially newsworthy wasn’t the value of the cards — which, it turns out, contained almost $1,000 in cash and […]

I’d like to tell you a Christmas story. I’ve got a few of the main elements — a stable, some livestock, three wiseguys, and one devoutly religious couple, desperately seeking shelter on Christmas Eve. The couple is Afaf and Jamal Rashmawy, who just happen to have been born in Bethlehem — specifically in Beit-Suhar, or […]

The knock on my hotel-room door came early in the morning, just a few minutes after my alarm went off. I opened it to find a male co-worker offering me a pair of his underwear. There was nothing kinky about his gesture. In fact, I’m not sure which one of us was more embarrassed — […]

The best compliment I ever got came from a stranger in a Chicagoland mall. We were trapped together in some sort of children’s play area, held hostage by our young sons, who were chasing each other around a big fiberglass treehouse. If you’re a parent, you know how these scenes go: Kids have a way […]

Late as usual, I’ve got a ghost story for you. It’s about a dead poet, two local authors, and their brush with the supernatural. And I swear, I’m only exaggerating a little bit. Instead of a dark and stormy night, this tale begins on a bright and blustery morning. Jacqueline Jackson was putting her trash […]

I’ve never thought of myself as particularly courageous. I don’t do bungee jumping or downhill skiing or drag racing or recreational drugs. I have to psych myself up to visit the dentist, and I don’t pick fights unless I’m pretty sure I can win. Lately, though, I’ve discovered that I’m a lot braver than I […]

I work for a newspaper that has a circulation of 30,000. I have three co-workers on the editorial side, two so young, I could be their mother. Our “newsroom” is a basement. The “view” from my window is the backside of a Dumpster. I’m not bewailing these conditions. The kids I work with are supercool, […]