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Alan Keyes was rebuked by top Illinois Republicans after he called Mary Cheney a "selfish hedonist" Credit: Photo by Nick Steinkamp

As if Alan Keyes wasn’t embarrassing enough with his hours-long diatribes,
the Republican candidate for U.S. Senate had to go off and verbally slime the
vice president’s daughter.

That’s just great. It’s not as if Dick Cheney holds grudges or anything. Calling Cheney’s lesbian daughter a selfish hedonist will have absolutely no repercussions.

If Keyes keeps this up, Cheney might just descend on Illinois one day with an armada of bulldozers and move all of our federal highways to Indiana or another sufficiently “red” state.

Of course, the Cheney crack was only the latest public-relations disaster for the Maryland talk-show host. There are so many I’ve lost track. Let’s see, Keyes likened women who have abortions to “terrorists,” he flip-flopped on slavery reparations (formerly opposed, now in favor), he ridiculed Democratic nominee Barack Obama for not having any slave ancestors, and he has thrown childish tantrums when journalists have asked legitimate questions. Then he lashed out at the vice president’s daughter. I’m sure I’ve missed a few, but you get the idea.

At times like these, it’s human nature to look for someone to blame. It’s tough to blame Keyes because, well, Keyes is Keyes. He was, after all, totally consistent when he moved from saying all homosexuals are selfish hedonists to saying that Mary Cheney is a selfish hedonist.

Anyone with an Internet connection and a half-hour to spare could have predicted this would happen and that Keyes would turn out to be a complete embarrassment to the Republican Party and the state of Illinois.

I prefer to blame state Sen. Dave Syverson, R-Rockford. Syverson, who is the treasurer of the Illinois GOP, actively recruited Keyes and then touted him to anyone who would listen.

I happen to like Syverson. He is energetic and bright, and his constituents are well-represented. But he really blew this one. And he wasn’t alone. Retiring U.S. Sen. Peter Fitzgerald said he was “ecstatic” about Keyes’ selection as his potential replacement. Illinois Senate Republican Leader Frank Watson actively lobbied nonplussed state-party chair Judy Baar Topinka to pick Keyes. State Sen. Steve Rauschenberger, R-Elgin, who wants to run for governor in two years, helped Syverson recruit Keyes and then helped convince the state central committee to vote for him.

Still, this is Syverson’s project. He has to wear the jacket. And just so nobody forgets, here’s a Syverson quote roundup:

• “With Alan Keyes, you have someone who can energize our party’s base and raise money” (Rockford Register-Star).

•Keyes is much more like Ross Perot on trade. He doesn’t like current trade agreements. He’ll appeal to people who are unhappy about manufacturing jobs leaving the country. He’ll sell very well in downstate Illinois” (Rockford Register-Star).

• “He will become an Illinoisan pretty quick, because his views are pretty in line with Illinois” (Chicago Tribune).

• “I think everyone knows about him, his reputation. He is an articulate, compassionate individual, and I think he would be an excellent candidate for Illinois” (Chicago Tribune).

• He [Keyes] believes that there is a void in Illinois and that Obama certainly does not represent Illinois. And he believes that he would be, if he were to run, much more representative of Illinois” (Chicago Sun-Times).

• “It’s not necessarily where you live as much as who you represent and the views you represent” (Chicago Sun-Times).

• “Social issues are way down the level of priority in this election. In Illinois, right now people are going to be voting their pocketbooks much more than in other election years” (State Journal-Register).

Keyes, of course, hasn’t talked about pocketbook issues. If Syverson had bothered to do any sort of due diligence, he would have discovered that Keyes almost never talks about pocketbook issues. To Keyes, once the nation gets its moral house in order the economic stuff will magically take care of itself.

Syverson has long had his sights on the state-party chairmanship. But to have
gambled his future on Alan Keyes, of all people, is perhaps the most bizarre
act of political risk-taking by a usually normal human being that I have ever
seen. I doubt that there’s a state chairmanship in his immediate future.

Rich Miller publishes Capitol Fax, a daily political newsletter, and CapitolFax.com.

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