Amy Alkon

My friend and I are debating why it is that men don’t want you when you want them, yet they’re all gung-ho when you aren’t interested. She believes that we just want what we can’t have. Could it be that simple?  – Pondering In looking for love, a number of people confuse “the chase” with […]

My husband has a great body, but since we got married two years ago, he has completely stopped working out. One reason I was initially so attracted to him was that he was in great shape. I go to Pilates four times a week. How do I motivate him to go back to the gym? […]

When my husband comes home from a stressful day at work, he likes to play shoot-‘em-up games on his phone. He says it relaxes him. I’d like to connect and talk before he goes into his mental man cave. Also, when he’s into a game, it’s annoying even to ask what he wants for dinner. […]

A guy my girlfriend dated seven years ago is now an aspiring artist, and he gave my girlfriend one of his paintings. It’s abstract, splashy and horrible. I find it disrespectful of him to give it to her (because she’s in a relationship). She said he does lots of paintings, sells almost none, and gives […]

You’ve answered some questions about online dating recently, but I haven’t seen you mention dating sites that do criminal background checks. Do you think it’s a smart idea to sign up for one of these or is it just more marketing hogwash? – Wondering There’s that very attractive man you see on a dating site who […]

My otherwise wonderful husband always leaves his wet towel on the bed (on my side!). I’ve asked him to stop doing this countless times, but I don’t think he’s being passive-aggressive or anything. I think he just spaces out after showering. How can I get him to remember?  –Soggy It’s good for a man to […]

A guy friend of 20 years and I once fooled around years ago. Though he has a girlfriend, he keeps throwing sexual remarks into our conversations, sending inappropriate texts and asking me to send naked photos. I wouldn’t be interested even if he were single, and I’ve been giving subtle hints, like “ha-ha … gotta […]

I’m a woman looking for a new boyfriend and considering various online dating sites. Some have long questionnaires and they factor your answers into an “algorithm” to match you with the best possible partner. Are these sites significantly better than the others? – Site Seeker Sites using these compatibility “algorithms” would seem to have some added […]

My girlfriend and I broke up recently, so I’m back in the dating pool. Do you think online dating is a good way to meet people? If so, which are the best dating sites? – Diving In Asking “Which dating site is best?” is like asking “Is pro basketball a viable career?” That question can […]

My boyfriend of three years cheated on me, and when I found out, he dumped me. I’m getting over it, but boy, it’s a slow process. Some days I’m fine, and others I feel super sad or really angry. Is there some way I can speed up my recovery so I can get on with […]

My girlfriend of two years had me help her download photos from her phone, and I found about two dozen close-ups of her private parts. She said she was “just curious.” Well, okay, but why not use a mirror? Besides, she’s in her 30s. Surely, she knows what her parts look like without a photo […]

I have a close friend whose relationships always end badly. The new guy she’s dating has a reputation as a user. My friend’s very successful, and I believe he’s dating her for her business contacts. I need to be honest with her about this. How should I do that – considering she falls in love […]