You have to give director Michael Bay credit for one thing — he sure makes destruction look pretty. This is a dubious skill to be sure and it’s on display, ad nauseum, in Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, the sequel to the 2007 eardrum-buster that made a huge amount of money around the world. This entry is just as loud, just as obnoxious and just as simplistic as the first. Yet, for some odd reason, I had a relatively good time, though I have an appointment with my doctor to check for hearing loss.
This time out, Sam (Shia LaBeouf) is fleeing for his life once more as he finds himself in possession of information that will lead the evil Decepticons to the location of a key that will activate a machine that will destroy our sun. Not really sure why this is a good thing, but it’s quite a mess as the military becomes involved, Paris and the Egyptian Pyramids are wiped out and good robot Optimus Prime has his dead metallic carcass hauled halfway round the world to be reactivated for the film’s final throwdown.
Bay knows his audience (teenage boys) and gives them exactly want they want — explosions, sophomoric humor and Megan Fox, whose cleavage should get a separate credit, as it appears so often on screen here. On the plus side, John Turturro provides much-needed comic relief as a disgraced government agent looking for redemption. On the down side, the robots Skids and Mudflap are the most offensive racial stereotypes since Amos and Andy. Of course, you may not notice any of this, as the bludgeoning Bay inflicts is relentless. The only thing bigger than the film’s decibel level is its emptiness.
Contact Chuck Koplinski at firstname.lastname@example.org.